Beginners
by Bellarsam Chrisjulittle
Summary: Maria receives the best possible news at the worst possible time. No Anschluss; family still in Austria. Title a tip of the hat to Christopher Plummer's Oscar-winning role and film, but has nothing else to do with this story.
1. Finding Out

Maria sat in Dr. Hans Falk's office alone, wiggling her fingers to let out her impatience and nerves. She, along with her husband, had been to Hans's home many times as friends and guests, but she had never come as a patient. Georg was somewhere else in town, meeting a business friend from Vienna for supper, which gave Maria the perfect opportunity to schedule this appointment without his knowledge. She did not want to tell him anything until she had a definite answer.

Finally, Hans came back into the office carrying a chart with a smile. It widened as he closed the door and saw the nervous and impatient Maria sitting before his empty desk. "Are you sure you want to do this without Georg here, Maria?"

"Yes," said Maria right away. "I don't have any other symptoms and I don't want to get both of our hopes up for nothing, in case it _is _nothing."

Hans's smile widened even further, full of warmth, as he sat down at his desk and folded his hands in front of him. "Well, Maria, you'll be happy to know that it is _not _nothing and you _will _bring some very good news home to him. You're six weeks along."

Maria's mouth opened in a silent gasp as her eyes filled with a thousand emotions. Thankfully, she settled on pure awe and the beginnings of joy. "Oh, my…you're sure? Like I said, I don't feel any of the symptoms of pregnancy that I've heard about: morning sickness, strange cravings, more emotional…"

Hans chuckled. "Symptoms always vary depending on each pregnancy, Maria. You were right to suspect when you only had one missed cycle and one late, now missed, to go on. And besides, you may experience those symptoms later as the pregnancy progresses; you're still in the early stages. And perhaps you have experienced pregnancy symptoms without even knowing it."

Maria's wide eyes narrowed slightly in confusion. "Like what?"

Now Hans leaned back in his chair, a bit uncomfortable topic-wise beneath the calm doctor he was. "Well, you may feel more sensitivity in certain areas of the body, and your…how shall I put it…you may have strong cravings of a different kind than food?"

Maria's face turned the color of a ripe tomato as she realized what Hans was trying to say. She had an overwhelming urge to crawl under the sofa and die, not only because of what Hans was describing, but because she had indeed been experiencing those symptoms in the past few weeks.

Hans smiled sympathetically in understanding. "Don't worry, Maria, this is completely natural."

Maria allowed herself to feel reassured and tried to move on to a different topic. "Well…what happens now? I mean, are there certain routines I should follow, certain foods I should avoid?"

"Ah, yes," said Hans, pulling out a small notepad from his jacket pocket and began to write. "I am going to write you a prescription for prenatal vitamins, which I will tell you how and when to take. I'll also make a list of certain foods you should avoid altogether or limit your intake of. But the lists aren't long; the main priority is to remember that you are eating for two people."

Maria nodded, exhaling in quiet excitement. But then one question came to mind which made her blush, but she had to know. "And…what about…um…"

Thankfully, Hans saved her from stuttering more words. "Marital relations will not do any harm to the baby, only keep in mind that the bigger the baby gets, the more gentle it has to be." And then Hans immediately went back to the safer topics of vitamins and dieting, saving Maria the trouble of jumping into the lake of embarrassment.

* * *

The whole cab ride home, she didn't know whether to sing with joy or shake with nerves. More than anything, she felt overwhelmed by all of the emotions coursing through her being.

_ A child…I'm with child!_

Maria smiled with such joy she thought her face might break, pressing her hands to her still-flat stomach. She chose to save her nerves and fears at another time, preferably for after she had told her husband and he would be there to help her.

_Oh, I can't wait to tell him! _Three weeks into their honeymoon two months ago, Maria had gotten her period which put their 'marital relations' on hold for a few days. Maria had been so nervous he would be annoyed with her, but his reaction was the opposite of what she feared. He was completely understanding and sweet, and Maria realized she should not have been so surprised, since he _had _been married before.

During that period, the two of them had discussed the possibility of more children. Georg had said he could think of nothing better than having children with her, the ultimate proof of their love for each other. Maria felt the same way, despite the underlying nerves and fears she knew she would have if she _did _become pregnant.

_What if it's too soon? We haven't even been married three months! _This _was _a disconcerting thought, but it didn't worry Maria too much, remembering Georg's reaction to her question about the possibility of more children.

_Stop worrying, Maria. He will be as happy as you are now. _

With that thought in her mind, Maria got out of the cab once it stopped before the villa, wrapping her jacket tighter around her in protection from the chilly November air. Either than that, she barely noticed it; she felt too much inside to feel that much outside.

* * *

Georg would not be back until late, so Maria put the children to bed by herself. Her last stop, as always, was the large bedroom of the three oldest girls. As usual, Brigitta was already in bed, curled up with a book. Louisa sat on her bed with the hairbrush ready and waiting for Maria. Liesl sat at their bedroom window, looking out into the night with a faraway, pensive, almost solemn expression.

As Maria sat behind Louisa and began brushing her braids out – a nightly tradition that had started months ago, once Maria had gained Louisa's trust – Maria gently spoke to Liesl. "What's on your mind, Liesl?"

"Tomorrow is going to be a hard day," said Liesl with a melancholy sigh.

Maria looked at Liesl with concern. "Why do you say that, Liesl?"

All three young women turned their heads to look with incredulous surprise at Maria. "What?" asked Maria, putting the brush down, disconcerted by the identical looks the girls were giving her.

"Father didn't tell you?" asked Brigitta, her eyes wide with shock.

"Tell me what?" asked Maria, who was beginning to get worried that she had missed something.

Liesl sighed. "Our mother died four years ago tomorrow."

Maria's eyes widened and she gasped. "Oh…my dears, I really didn't know, I'm sorry."

"It's all right," said Liesl, walking up to Maria. "I just can't believe Father didn't tell you."

"Neither can I," murmured Maria, shaking her head. Not wanting to fall into brooding until she was alone, Maria turned to the girls and asked, "Well, are there any traditions or things you do to remember your mother? I know you have school tomorrow, but still –"

"We usually take flowers to her grave," said Louisa, her voice becoming almost cold. "I don't know what Father will want to do, though, because we always did it by ourselves before…I don't even know if he'll want to be with us or by himself, like he used to…"

Maria sighed, wishing she had an answer to give the young women, but she had none. "Well, we'll all find out tomorrow, I suppose." The four females then fell into somewhat troubled silence. Maria finished brushing Louisa's hair, and hugged each girl before they got into bed.

When all three were settled, Maria paused in the doorway to look at them all. "You know I'm here for all of you, if ever you need anything tomorrow, right?"

They all smiled at her. "We know, Mother," said Brigitta. "Good night."

"Good night, darlings," said Maria after Liesl and Louisa had said the same. But when she closed the door softly behind her, the small smile she had been wearing disappeared from her face.

All of the joy that she had felt upon learning she was pregnant had fled her system by now, and she was no longer feeling excited for Georg's return. _Why didn't he tell me? Can I even tell him tonight or tomorrow, due to the circumstances?_

The only thing that she could take comfort in was in the word the three girls still called her: "Mother." Maria had never taken that title for granted, ever since Marta was the first to call her that on her wedding day nearly three months ago. And to be called that by the children at this time Maria took as a very precious gift. She felt unbelievable relief that the children were not distancing themselves from her on this day, and were not looking at her or treating her any differently or with less love.

As Maria silently and slowly made her way to what she knew would be her empty bedroom, she was now scared to find out if the same could be said for her husband when he came home...She put her hands to her six-week pregnant belly and closed her eyes in a prayer..

_Oh,_ Mutti,_ stay with me through this..._


	2. Being Avoided

For the first time since she had come to the Von Trapp villa five months ago, Maria Von Trapp felt completely useless.

She'd spent the morning almost completely alone. She had woken up two hours later than usual, propped up by pillows, Goethe's _Faust _open on her lap, and her bedside lamp still on. She nearly panicked when she found the children's rooms empty after running to their rooms without her robe and slippers. Only when she had found Frau Schmidt downstairs did she learn that Georg had gotten the children up, fed and to school on his own without waking her.

_Either he got home after I dozed off or he never came up to our room last night. Why? And he woke up the children and got them to school on his own without waking me. Why? And now he hasn't come back after dropping them off. Why_

Why, indeed; it was all Maria could think about now. Especially why Georg was not speaking to her, why he was avoiding her. _Today…that must be it. Of course my presence would be hard on him today of all days…_

The twenty-two-year-old spent the morning sitting at the drawing room window that faced the front of the house, absently mending some of the children's clothing and watching for her husband to come back. But he didn't.

Finally, the lunch bell rang, and Maria put down her task and went to the dining room. Only her place was set, and she looked at Frau Schmidt.

She spoke with a sympathetic look on her face, "The Captain called and said he would not be home for lunch. He asks that you pick up the little ones from school and he will pick up the others later, and asks that you and the girls meet them right afterward at Agathe's gravesite and be ready."

Maria nodded slowly, taking in this information. "He didn't say where he was? He didn't want to speak to me?"

Frau Schmidt's look and tone became even more sympathetic to her. "No, he just said he would be out and to pass along the message." She laid a comforting hand on Maria's shoulder. "Don't take it to heart, Baroness. It's a hard day for everyone."

Maria nodded and gave a tremulous smile before sitting down to her lunch. But she didn't eat much, because most of her appetite had disappeared. Against her will, she felt angry. Not that Georg was choosing to be by himself, but that he had cut her off completely – the previous evening, when she woke up, at breakfast, and now lunch, when he wouldn't even tell her these afternoon plans himself, as if he were angry with her!

So she ate her lunch with a new fury and then hastily left to walk to the primary school and pick up the girls. _Mutti, no matter how I feel, don't let me worry the children; this is just as hard a day for them as it is for my husband._

On the walk there, Maria wondered if he really _was _angry with her. But why? Of course she understood that, today of all days, Georg would not have Maria at the forefront of his mind, and Maria understood that. But to treat her the same way he had when she had first come to the villa? Even worse than that?

_Maria, don't. It's his grief, nothing more. You are always more withdrawn on the anniversaries of your parents' deaths, and it would be foolish to expect him to behave as he does on normal days. Just be patient and don't confront him about it; that will only lead to an argument and that is the last thing anyone in this family needs today of all days. _

When she heard the sound of many children, Maria immediately snapped out of her train of thought, wanting to put on a strong face for the girls. She smiled when she saw Brigitta, Marta and Gretl amongst the many children, looking for her. Today, the primary school had only a half-day of school, due to an all-school teacher's meeting in the afternoon.

The three girls soon spotted her and went to her. Gretl ran forward first, and Maria picked her up in a tight hug, relishing in the sheer joy her littlest one always had upon seeing her. "Hello, Mother!"

"Hello, everyone," said Maria, reaching down the hand not holding Gretl to caress Marta's head and then Brigitta's cheek. "How was your day? I'm sure it was nice to have only a half-day of class."

"I made a picture for you," said Gretl as Maria set her on her feet.

"That's so sweet," said Maria, taking her hand and also Marta's hand. "Let's go home and you can show it to me."

When they began walking towards home, Brigitta asked tentatively, "Are _you _feeling all right, Mother?"

Maria, surprised and touched by the compassion in the eleven-year-old's voice, instantly replied, "Of course, darling, why wouldn't I be?" Listening to her voice, Maria cringed at how falsely cheery it sounded.

Brigitta looked uncomfortable and worried as she, in turn, replied, "Well…you didn't help wake us up or join us for breakfast. Father said to let you sleep in since you so rarely get to, but we worried you might feel sick and he didn't want us to worry so he didn't say anything…and, well, today being today…"

Maria kept her face determinedly neutral yet reassuring as she put an arm around her middle daughter. "I feel absolutely fine, Brigitta," she said in as firm of a voice as she could. "Don't worry about me."

But even as she spoke, her mind was reeling with this new information she had learned about her husband's behavior. _He's even used the children to avoid seeing me…_

* * *

Maria's afternoon with her three youngest daughters was infinitely better than her morning alone. Knowing that they would be going to their mother's grave later that afternoon, Marta wanted to bring flowers. However, it being November, no flowers were in bloom or even alive outside.

But Maria had a solution for that. "We can _make _some," she said. "We'll use paper and paints and our crayons and scissors to make some flowers."

Marta and Gretl were instantly excited by this idea, and Brigitta smiled at it. She joined them for a while before she pulled out a pad of paper and pen.

"I always write a letter to my mother and pretend to mail it to her," said Brigitta in explanation, almost shyly.

Maria smiled and squeezed her hand. "I often talk to my mother in my thoughts, especially right after she died. I believed, and still do, she became a kind of guardian angel for me."

Brigitta smiled. "I like that."

"Me too," said Marta. "I only remember her a little bit…I remember she smelled like lilies, and she had the prettiest smile."

"That's right," said Brigitta, her wistful smile widening. "Lilies were her favorite flower."

Gretl had stopped coloring and had lowered her head. "What's wrong, little one?" asked Maria, lifting her chin up with her finger.

The five-year-old looked apologetic, sad, and slightly worried. "I…I don't remember her…"

Maria felt immediate sympathy for Gretl, and gathered the little girl to her for a hug. "Gretl, you were only a baby when she passed…no one blames you for that."

"Not even Father?" asked Gretl, her voice muffled against her mother's dress.

Maria's jaw tightened at the thought of her husband, and said fiercely, "_Especially _not your father. And whether or not you remember her, your mother loved you with all of her heart. She loved all of you." Maria looked at Marta and Brigitta as she spoke the last sentence.

Marta joined in the hug, and Brigitta nodded with tears in her eyes, smiling.

It was the first time all day that Maria didn't feel useless.


	3. Stinging Slap

When three o'clock came around, Maria and the girls left the villa dressed in warm fall coats and carrying the flowers they'd all made. Because Georg had the car, Maria and the girls took the bus to the church. They arrived just after the others, who were waiting at the entrance into the graveyard.

It was the first time in nearly twenty-four hours that Maria had seen her husband, and she had to bite back a gasp at how different he appeared from the previous afternoon. The red in his eyes told her that he'd gotten little to no sleep the previous night; the rigid way in which he held his body and face told her he was keeping everything he was feeling deep inside himself; the restless fingers of his left hand reminded her of a leak in a watering can. He clearly was feeling a lot of things but he was keeping them hidden even from himself. Something he used to do when they first met, and that worried her.

What worried her more was that he refused to meet her gaze.

"Those are beautiful, girls!" said Liesl, who was holding a bouquet of lilies.

"They were Mother's idea," said Marta, who smiled up at her.

Maria gave a small smile back and then looked at her husband almost shyly. Georg still would not look at her.

"Come along, everyone," he said, opening the gate for them. Maria cringed at how curt and emotionless his tone of voice was, and how he commanded more than asked. He led the way into the cemetery and the children followed.

Maria took one step into the graveyard but then she stopped. Was she supposed to go with them? Was it appropriate for her to? Did the children or Georg want her to?

Georg wouldn't even look at her…no, it was best that she just stay here and wait for them.

Holding onto the gate, Maria watched the family disappear over the crest of a tiny hill in the expansive graveyard. Biting her lip, she turned her eyes in a different direction, to another part of the graveyard…where her parents were buried. She wanted so much to walk over to the graves, but she wanted to be here when they got back, lest she put Georg in an even blacker mood. Also, she had no flowers to bring to the graves.

Suddenly, Maria felt useless again, and she hated it.

* * *

The eight of them weren't at the grave for very long before they came back to the entrance where Maria had been waiting. Again, Georg completely ignored her as he passed her on the way to the car. _All right, I feel like this is getting ridiculous, _thought Maria. To be distant in grief was one thing; to act like a high school girl with a grudge was quite another. But still she held her tongue. _Remember, Maria, slack…lots and lots of slack…_

The ride back to their villa happened in relative silence. Maria sat in the passenger seat beside Georg, and she kept looking at him. And still he never once looked at her. Maria felt her eyes beginning to prickle and her anger and hurt beginning to rise again. By the time they got home, Maria was having a very hard time holding her tongue.

When the family went inside, Georg walked towards his study. Maria knew that he would shut the door behind him and not come out until dinner or just disappear again.

Maria couldn't take it anymore.

She hurried up to him, though he did not stop or slow down. "Georg, can I get you anything?" _Why must I sound so timid?_

"No." The first word he'd spoken to her all day, and his tone was curt and harsh. Maria felt her memory reeling back to her first day here.

But she wasn't giving up. "Can I do anything for you at all?"

"_No_."

Now Maria felt desperate. "Georg, _please, _let me do something for y –"

Georg stopped and turned to her sharply, and finally looked at her. "Just _keep out of my sight!" _he snapped, his eyes blazing just as they had the day they'd argued by the lake.

Maria recoiled and stepped back as if she had been slapped. No, this was _worse _than a slap. Maria's vision blurred with the tears that came to her eyes and she felt her lips and chin beginning to tremble. She felt his gaze still on her and the children's gazes all on her like burns. She felt humiliated, embarrassed, angry, and more hurt than she had ever felt in her entire life. And her inner voice was screaming at her about how foolish she'd been, and that Georg probably wished she had never come into his life at all…because she never would have if Agathe hadn't died…

This thought made her anger melt, drowning in her humiliation and hurt. She felt defeated and crushed; because she had been a fighter all of her life, never going down easily, it was painful. For true fighters, when they go down, they go down harder than anyone.

So all Maria could do was lower her head, say "Yes, Captain," in a strangled whisper, and then run, run as fast as she could up the stairs and out of sight. She thought she heard someone or someones calling for her, but she couldn't distinguish if they were saying "Mother" or "Maria" or if it was all in her head, where her thoughts were screaming.

When she finally stopped, Maria saw that she had not come to her bedroom, but the room she had stayed in when she had been the governess. It devastated her even more that she wasn't surprised; she wanted to hide so she went where she no longer belonged.

Or perhaps it was where she had always belonged when here. Even though the bedding was completely gone and the mattress was completely bare. Tears streaming down her face, Maria sank onto the edge of the mattress and absently pressed a hand to her stomach. This action made her remember what she now carried. She felt so scared and alone as she buried her tear-streaked face in her hands.

_Oh, my child…Oh, Mutti, what am I going to do?_


	4. Loving Comfort

The sound of many small pairs of feet running down the hall towards the room and then into the room made Maria lift her head. She was just in time to see all seven children come into the room and rush towards her. The boys and Louisa climbed onto the mattress so they could rub her back, Liesl and Brigitta sat beside her to hold her hands, and the two little ones stood in front of her to hug her.

"Please don't cry, Mother," said little Gretl, kissing Maria's cheek.

"It's going to be all right," said Marta, her arms around Maria's neck in an embrace.

Maria was surprised and beyond touched at this gesture of her children, and she couldn't help but lean her head on Marta's shoulder for a moment. "Oh, children," she managed to say when she lifted her head to look at all of them. "I'm sorry to be like this, I just –"

Liesl lifted her free hand to squeeze her shoulder and interrupted her. "Mother, stop. You have nothing to be sorry for."

"No, you don't," said Friedrich. "Father had no right to speak to you like that."

After getting over her slight surprise at what Friedrich said, considering how much he looked up to his father, Maria spoke, "Children, this is a very difficult day for him, we must be patient –"

"It doesn't matter if the mountains get swallowed up by the earth," said Louisa. "He has no right to treat you like he has done all day. Ignoring you, shutting you out, and now snapping at you."

"That's right," said Kurt indignantly, who considered himself very protective of his mother. "He's treating you just like he used to treat us!"

Maria closed her eyes tightly at the truth of this statement, forcing back tears again.

Brigitta squeezed her hand and rubbed her arm. "Don't worry, Mother. I'm sure Father already regrets his actions. He loves you so much. He'll apologize in no time."

"And if he doesn't, we'll make him," said Louisa, almost fiercely.

Despite herself, Maria chuckled a little, even as her eyes filled with new tears she couldn't hold back. "Oh, you dear children…I can't tell you how much I appreciate this…To tell you the truth, I wouldn't have blamed any of you if you'd been distant with me today."

The children all looked taken aback by this at first, before it was Louisa who spoke first. "Mother, may I tell you something?"

Maria turned around on the bed, and soon everyone was sitting on the bed in a clumped circle. "Of course, Louisa."

Louisa sighed. "I know it took me a bit longer than everyone else to really open up to you. What helped me a lot was the fact that you knew what it was like to lose your parents. The fact that you were open with us helped me trust you a lot, and even before you and Father got engaged, and especially after, you were always clear with us that we were not to forget our birthmother, or think that you were replacing her…because you knew from the start that was impossible."

All of the other children nodded their heads in agreement. "Louisa's right," said Brigitta. "I think that was why, when Father told us he wanted to marry you, we felt nothing but complete happiness."

"Truth be told," said Liesl with a small smile. "You were a mother to all of us from the very first day you were here. When you helped me after I climbed in through your window and stopped Father from being angry with me…it felt like something a mother would do, that _my _mother would do."

"And remember dinner that night?" asked Friedrich with a small smile. "You made us all feel guilty for the pranks we had pulled on you by lying to Father about the pinecone – even though he _knew _it was there – and saying we had treated you with such welcome since arriving."

"Yes," said Kurt, who laughed at the memory. "You made all of the girls _cry, _even!"

Everyone shared a laugh at that memory.

"And every night you would read us a story and sing a lullaby," said Gretl with a smile.

"And you help me go back to sleep when I have a bad dream," said Marta, snuggling up to her mother.

Louisa gave Maria a satisfied smile, glad that her siblings had helped her prove her point. "From the start you loved us, and you didn't have to at all – you _chose _to."

Marta tugged on her mother's skirt to get her attention. "My teacher once said to my class that your heart is only the size of your fist." She made a fist with her little hand as a visual demonstration. "But the love it can hold…" Marta opened her fist, her fingers bending back and spreading wide. "Has no limit."

Maria found this so beautiful, and knowing that the children loved her unconditionally as a mother and did not resent her at all…"Oh, my dear children, I love you so much!" was all she could say before opening her arms so she could embrace all of them. The children all hugged her, nearly piling up on her, and Maria's smile through her tears glowed with happiness she had not felt all day. No, the title of "mother" was something she would never take for granted again.

_Mother…Mutti…_

When the embrace between mother and children had gradually loosened and then ended, Maria, knowing what she felt she had to do, took Marta and Gretl by the hand and said to all seven, "Come on, I'll walk you to the schoolroom."

The group of eight silently made their way downstairs to the schoolroom, a large room with bookshelves, large tables and desks to work at, and comfortable rugs and chairs to sit and read on. Maria ushered them inside. "Now why don't you get a head start on your homework before dinner, all right? I'm going out for a while. I probably won't be back until you're all in bed."

"Where are you going, Mother?" asked Marta, looking up at her with worried eyes. "You…_are _coming back, right?"

Maria was torn between laughing and crying at Marta's words. She immediately wrapped her arms around the seven-year-old and kissed her head. "Of course I will, sweetheart. I would never put the seven of you through that. I just need some time to myself right now, and need to visit a few places and people. All right?"

All seven children nodded at her with understanding, compassionate looks. After kissing each of their faces one more time, Maria left the school room, at least feeling a little less likely to fall apart, thanks to her wonderful children.

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, Maria came back down to the first floor wearing the same outfit she had worn the first day she had ever come to the villa. Minus the hat; she'd never really liked it. She wore it for three reasons: it would bring her back to a time when things were much more simple, the outfit would keep her warm in the wet November air and winds, and it was a reflection of her anger at Georg. He'd never liked this dress.

Coming down to the first floor, Maria's eyes involuntarily went to the door of her husband's study. Closed. Locked, too, in all likelihood.

Frau Schmidt saw her standing rigid as a board there, staring at the door with burning, bright eyes, and a jaw that was trembling despite the best efforts not to.

"Baroness?" asked Frau Schmidt cautiously, gently. She'd witnessed what had happened from the shadow of a doorway, and knew it best not to make her presence known then. Her heart completely went out to Maria, and she hated what she was duty-bound and compassion-bound to ask. "Where should I tell the Captain you've gone, when he asks?" She made sure to emphasize the _when._

Maria took a deep shaky breath and squeezed Frau Schmidt's hand, but her eyes didn't leave the door as she answered. "Out of his sight."

With that, Maria left the villa, walking fast and not looking back, knowing if she did that she would completely break down.


	5. Hearing Wisdom

_It's been too long, _thought Maria.

She stood on the opposite side of the street from Nonberg Abbey. Her feet were sore from walking all the way there, but she barely noticed. The building had not changed at all, and she knew that inside there would not be very many changes either, which she took great comfort in knowing. Just looking at it brought a calm to her soul that she had needed all day.

A warning bell announcing a quarter to five set her feet in motion, and she crossed the street and rang the abbey bell. Maria smiled when she recognized the nun coming to answer her ring.

"Maria!" exclaimed Sister Margaretta when she could distinguish Maria's face. She immediately opened the gate and the two women embraced. When they pulled apart, Maria could see the surprise, delight, and worry on the older woman's face. "To what do we owe this surprise visit?"

"Well . . ." Maria had never been a good liar – her honest nature prevented her from telling anything beyond white lies – but she knew she didn't want to spill out her story right here at the gate, if at all. "I have some time to myself today, and I realized that it's been a while since I've gone to a service here…"

It was as vague as she could say it, and she knew that Sister Margaretta could see in her face, eyes and body language that all was not right with her. All she could do was pray that she would not ask questions. God heard her prayer. "Of course, Maria, you will always be welcome here," said Sister Margaretta, taking Maria's arm and leading her inside the sanctuary. She asked no questions and demanded no answers, and Maria gave a silent prayer of thanks.

* * *

Going to mass with the sisters felt like poison in the form of her favorite childhood sweet. While it felt wonderful to be back among the sisters in the familiar service of her religion, she also felt her eyes fill with tears as waves of nostalgia and homesickness rush over her. When she had been a postulant, her life had been so simple; then her heart had been quiet, like Sleeping Beauty, content in the world of dreams that knew nothing of the love between a man and a woman. What she wouldn't give for that state of mind right now.

The sound of the sisters' choir in the balcony above was so beautiful and ethereal, and Maria wished she could float along it's peaceful waves. Her blurred gaze would shift between three focal points: the large cross above the altar, the white statue of the Blessed Mother off to the side, and the three dark kneeling figures of the Reverend Mother, Sister Berthe, and Sister Margaretta.

By the end of the service, Maria was kneeling with her hands folded, head bent and eyes closed. She sat in the back pew alone and in the shadows, with a dark shawl covering her hair, as was the rule for Catholic women to always have their heads covered in church. She remained in that position as the nuns filed out of the church in procession. She thought herself quite alone until she heard and sensed someone sit beside her.

"I thought I recognized you."

That was both very familiar and very welcome to the vulnerable Maria. She raised and turned her head, seeing the Reverend Mother sitting beside her with her warm smile.

"Oh, Reverend Mother!" she exclaimed softly, taking her mother figure's warm, wrinkled hands, which squeezed hers right back as they exchanged a reuniting glance.

Though Maria smiled, the Reverend Mother could read in her honest face that something had happened. Something traumatic. "My daughter, what has happened?"

Now Maria really had to work to keep her jaw and chin from trembling, but she realized that she felt safe now, safe to tell her sad story. Still, she didn't want to break down completely in front of the Reverend Mother. She'd never allowed herself to let herself go like that in front of anybody, even her husband. As a child, her abusive guardian would only become more violent and cruel at the sight of her tears, so Maria had learned a long time ago: only let God see your tears.

So, keeping a rein on her tears, Maria told her story of what had happened in the past twenty-four hours. But she did not tell the Reverend Mother of her pregnancy. Something stopped her tongue from saying it, and she chose not to dispute it. Perhaps her still-present love for her husband made her not want to tell anybody before him, or perhaps she was not yet ready to voice her fears and insecurities of motherhood.

Thankfully, she got through the story without letting more than a few tears out, which she always hastily brushed away. The Reverend Mother held her hand the entire time she talked, which helped her. The expression on her face revealed how shocking she found Georg's behavior to be, but the compassion and empathy she felt for Maria remained there.

When Maria was finished, all she could say at first was, "Oh, Maria…" and then fell into silent reflection of what Maria had told her. Maria waited for her to speak, eager for any advice or insight the wise woman could give her. After a few minutes, the Reverend Mother spoke. "You say your husband seemed completely normal before leaving for this business meeting in town?"

"Yes, completely," said Maria in earnest, for it was the truth. "He said he may be back late, kiss the children good night for him, kissed me good-bye and left."

The Reverend Mother shook her head, looking very skeptical. "What I can't understand is why he didn't tell you about today. Why would he _not _share this with you and then treat you like he has done today?"

Maria sighed and ran a hand across her face. "Exactly what I've asked myself over and over again, and he hasn't given me the chance to ask him himself…Oh, Reverend Mother, he's _never _been like this before, _never._"

The Reverend Mother sighed, her hand going to her chin. "Maria…I know this is a personal question, but it might provide some explanation…how often do you and your husband talk about the late Baroness?"

Maria took a moment to think about this question, for at first she couldn't really pinpoint the answer. "Honestly, not very often. The children talked about her with me much more than he's ever…she comes up sometimes in conversations, but we've never deliberately sat down and had a conversation with her as the main topic."

"Have you ever wanted to?"

Again, Maria had to pause before answering. The Reverend Mother was asking her questions she had never really thought about before. Her eyes focused on the statue of the Blessed Mother statue as she answered. "Sometimes…I've always been curious about her. I've learned a lot about her through the children, especially Liesl: her background, how she and Georg met, what kind of a mother she was, her death…when I fell in love with Georg, I became the happiest of women. Like I said before, if she came up in conversation it was neither painful to me or to Georg. But I never felt comfortable…or brave enough…to talk to him about her deliberately, because he never chose to do so with me."

"What were you afraid of, Maria?" asked the Reverend Mother.

Maria bit her lip as her eyes filled with fresh tears. "Of what happened today, I suppose. That he would retreat back into the man I first met…that he would wish I were not his wife, because I never would be if she hadn't died…" She rubbed her eyes, pushing back the tears. "I was afraid of losing him…and now what if I have?"

The Reverend Mother placed a warm hand on Maria's shoulder. "Maria, where is the strong faith I know you have? You have _not _lost his love, I am sure of that. And there is more to this story that neither of us know, and you won't know until you talk to your husband."

"And if he won't talk to me?"

"He will, Maria," said the Reverend Mother firmly. "He loves you, and he'll remember it soon if not already, now that you're obeying his order made in anger. And if not, it sounds like those children are more than ready to make their father see reason."

Maria couldn't help but give a watery chuckle, and met the Reverend Mother's gaze, finding comfort there.

The older woman resumed speaking, emphasizing every word. "Don't lose hope, Maria. I know there is an explanation for everything. God has not abandoned you and He never will." She sighed and squeezed Maria's hands. "If you need some time to yourself, you're more than welcome to spend the night here."

The idea was very tempting to Maria, who wanted to feel safe. But then Maria remembered words from the conversation that had changed the course of her life forever.

_"I knew I couldn't stay, and I knew here I would be away from it, I'd be…safe." _

_ "Maria, our abbey is not meant to be used as an escape…these walls were not build to shut out problems: you have to face them."_

The same words she had given Liesl when she had come back…Maria shook her head as the two women stood up in the empty church. "Thank you for offering, but no…I promised the children I would come home tonight…I don't want the sun to go down upon my anger and hurt."

The Reverend Mother looked at her in what could only be compassion and pride in her daughter. They embraced, and Maria took as much strength and courage as she could from the wise woman.

_Yes, I will go home tonight…but not before making a few more stops…_


	6. Paining Catharsis

By the time Maria came to the expansive cemetery she had come to with her family that afternoon, it was the time of sunset. Before arriving, Maria had stopped at a floral shop and bought a few small bouquets of flowers appropriate for each spot she planned to visit.

The place was pretty much deserted, for several reasons that Maria could guess: the day was drawing to a close, the chilly November air, and the clouds that warned of rain at any moment. Maria's shawl still covered her head, and she was bundled up in a good coat over her grey dress, strong warm shoes appropriate for this landscape, and a determination in what she needed to do.

Silently and slowly, she walked away from her mother's grave, wiping her eyes and controlling her breathing. For nearly a half an hour, Maria had knelt before the humble grave, scattering violets over the site and having a silent conversation with her mother. Maria had lost her mother when she had been eight years old, and the memories she had of her mother, though few, were powerful and always remained with her. How her hair smelled of rain, the music of her voice in any context, how gentle her hands were despite the tough finger calluses from years of sewing experience, how her smile had an illuminating quality, the stories and songs she would tell her daughter every day and every night…those memories, along with the Catholic faith her mother instilled in her from the very beginning, had saved Maria from becoming lost in grief, anger and darkness, as so often happens with people who have experienced horrible loss. At the grave, Maria had silently told her mother all that had happened since the previous night, her anger and hurt at her husband, and her fears about bearing and raising a baby all her own.

Her next stop was her mountain, but before she could leave the cemetery, she found herself walking to the gravesite of Agathe Whitehead Von Trapp, deceased four years. She shouldn't have been truly surprised but she was. Deciding that God guided her feet to this spot for a reason, she stopped and faced the grave.

It couldn't have been in bigger contrast to her mother's humble grave; the late Baroness's was huge with angels carved on each side of her name, a rose color to the stone. Looking down, Maria saw the painted paper flowers the little ones had made, the letter Brigitta had wrote, an a large bouquet of white lilies resting against the headstone.

Maria found words that she needed to speak, and speak aloud rather than in her head, because now she was speaking to a stranger. "Hello," she said, holding her hands tightly together. "I don't have to say who I am…you're in heaven, you see what God sees now…so you must know that I've never, _ever _born you any ill will. I _never _wanted to replace you, in the eyes of the children or in the eyes of Georg. I know what it's like to lose people I love."

The young woman felt a lump form very slowly in her throat, but she spoke determinedly against it. "Though we have never met, I have heard nothing but wonderful things about you. And because of that, I can't believe that you would be so selfish as to want Georg to be haunted by your ghost the rest of his life. He did that for over three years, and nearly lost his children – _your _children – because of it."

She was crying now, and begging. "Please...free him from your ghost and his guilt…all it does is slowly kill him and children…I lost them once, I…I couldn't bear losing them again. I've loved those children from the beginning…and I love Georg with all my heart…You, of all people, could understand that…"

By now, the lump in her throat had grown so big her words became lost. Tears streaming down her face in uncontrollable sobs, Maria ran from the grave and out of the cemetery.

* * *

Maria ran all the way to her special spot near her mountain, a true miracle since she was crying so hard. Finally she went on her knees when she stopped, and all of the physical effects of her outing caught up to her: feet sore from walking and running so much, empty stomach churning and growling for food, stuffed head from crying, chilled body from the November air. Maria wanted nothing more than to be back home, in her own bed, with a good meal in her stomach and Georg holding her.

Doubting that that last wish were possible made Maria want to scream.

When her crying finally calmed, Maria opened her now-clear eyes and raised her head. For the first time, she saw how dark it had become. She could barely see her mountain at all. Her eyes turned to the sky, and she saw a break in the clouds. She was able to make out a few stars before the clouds shifted, and the full moon came into view, illuminating everything beautifully for a few seconds.

It was enough for Maria; music was put into her heart, then her throat, then out of her mouth.

"_I sit and watch the sky,_

_And I can hear it breathe a sigh…"_

She sighed, and Georg's face came to mind as the moon went behind the clouds again.

_I think of him, how we were,_

_And when I think of him, then I remember…_

_Remember…"_

All she could see was Georg now, especially his eyes of blue fire, that had captured her from the start. All of the times he would look at her, his eyes saying everything in his heart, reflecting his heart…There was never a lie in them…Especially that night in the gazebo, when the walls between their hearts had come crashing down.

"_In his eyes, I can see_

_Where my heart longs to be._

_In his eyes, I see a gentle glow,_

_And that's where I'll be safe, I know._

_Safe in his arms, close to his heart,_

_But I don't know quite where to start…"_

Her voice faltered a little as she thought of the past twenty-four hours. She covered her stomach with her hands, where their child had only begun to grow, as if asking it for strength she needed. As much as she wanted to return home, and knowing that she must very soon, she was terrified of what she would find when she got there.

"_By looking in his eyes,_

_Will I see beyond tomorrow?_

_By looking in his eyes,_

_Will I see beyond the sorrow that I feel?_

_Will his eyes reveal to me promises or lies?"_

Again, Maria thought of her husband, and the way he would look at her. Ever since the day of the rowboat incident, when he had come back to life, his eyes, whenever he looked at her, always carried something when looking at her. First she couldn't define it, then she was afraid to, and now…it was the most precious treasure in the world.

"_But he can't conceal from me the love in his eyes!_

_I know their every look; they're like an open book._

_And, most of all, the look that hypnotized me…"_

Maria had always felt it, but now she knew that she could never stop loving him, no matter what happened or what he did to her. Now she was looking at the stars through the break in the clouds, her voice strong and clear.

"_If I'm wise, I will walk away, and gladly…_

_But sadly I'm not wise! It's hard to talk away the memories that you prize…_

_Love is worth forgiving for…now I realize:_

_Everything worth living for is there – in his eyes!"*_

Maria's head felt clearer now than it had been all day. Her memory went back to when Georg had snapped at her that day, causing her so much pain and hurt. She could see his eyes now…there was no hate, no steel-like coldness…just like that day by the lake, they were filled with pain, a struggle…except now, the love he had for her was there, just as it had been for months.

The young wife and expectant mother now had hope that it wasn't all lost. Just one day couldn't sweep away what she and Georg had. The words the Reverend Mother had spoken to her in comfort rang in her ears, giving her strength, and her own resolutions became even stronger. _I'm going home now and will find him. Even if he doesn't want to, we are going to talk. He is going to know I love him no matter what, and I will find out what is truly torturing him. This ghost will be put to rest once and for all, and we can look to our future, our child, with nothing but complete happiness! Oh, Mutti, I still have to tell him!_

It was this last thought that caused Maria to jump to her feet rapidly, ready to run all the way if she had to. But this action was a mistake. Immediately she became dizzy and nauseous, her sore feet and empty stomach only making things worse. Her heavy head became too much and soon she couldn't see anything anymore. She barely felt it when she collapsed onto the ground, her consciousness slipping away rapidly and then disappearing into the night air.

* * *

*"In His Eyes" from _Jekyll and Hyde: The Musical._


	7. Empowering Memory

_Dark. Cold. Damp. Empty. Alone. _

_ These were the only sensations Maria could feel. Was she falling, standing, lying down? Was she even confined to her body anymore? The only sound she could make out was the whistling and howling of a wind, all around her. Was it of earth or elsewhere?_

_ Did she even exist at all anymore?_

_ Then she thought she heard a new sound in the wind, a voice calling for something. First she couldn't make out any words, but then it grew louder and she could make it out. _

_ "Maria? Maria?"_

_ As it got louder, she could recognize the voice but was afraid to believe it to be true. It sounded like…_

_ "Maria? Oh, God, no! MARIA!" _

_ Yes, it really was the voice of her husband. And now his voice was closer than ever, stronger than the wind even though it was so gentle…and despairing._

_ "Oh, no, my love, what have I done?"_

_ Then, in less than a second, everything changed…_

* * *

…_The dream became a memory._

_ Maria had never experienced such a climate or atmosphere before. The weather was so warm, in the high eighties; the balmy breezes provided a lovely contrast to the bright sunlight; the moisture in the air from the turquoise sea all around her made the air smell almost sweet. She lay in a fold-out recliner chair near the bow of the sailboat, her eyes closed and completely relaxed. She still had yet to be convinced that she was not in heaven but on earth. The last two weeks with Georg had been heaven on earth._

_ The thought of her husband seemed to call him to her. In the next minute, she felt a shadow over her eyes and, neck and upper chest, and she opened them with some annoyance at the loss of sum of the sun's warmth. But that annoyance disappeared when she saw that it was the shadow of her husband, standing beside and looking down at his bride. Would she ever lose the urge to swoon every time she looked at him? Especially like this, in his most natural environment. He wore a short-sleeved, button-up white shirt, and a light, casual pair of pants with no shoes. His dark hair was mussed by the wind, and his olive skin had gotten a little darker in this sunlight. He was smiling at her. "Daydreaming?" he asked mischievously._

_ Maria smiled back up at him, her insides melting when she saw that his shirt was not buttoned at all. "Why would I do that now? Daydreaming is used when people want to escape their lives in some way. I don't want to go anywhere at the moment." _

_She loved her new ability to tease him like he teased her as they became even more at ease with each other. She was still getting used to the physical aspect of their relationship, but that didn't mean she didn't like it – really, really, _really _like it._

_It seemed Georg felt the same thing about both things, for his smile grew even wider. He held out his hands, which Maria took, and pulled her to her feet. He immediately leaned in for a kiss, drawing it out and taking all of the time he wanted to explore. Maria responded passionately, softly moaning and melting against him. No, she would never get used to anything about her husband – she would make sure of it._

_Eventually, Georg lifted his mouth from hers. "Does the sea meet your approval, Fraulein?" he asked, his voice leaving Maria in no doubt that he'd felt just as much affected by their sensual kiss as she had, which sent a thrill of womanly pride through her._

_To his question, Maria answered without a shred of teasing, only genuine honesty. "Oh, Georg, it's so beautiful, much more so than I could ever have imagined! All of my life, I've wanted to see the ocean and visit places like this, but I never thought I would."_

_ They had traveled to the south of France for the weekend, for Georg was eager to introduce Maria to the sea. He thanked God for such warm, beautiful weather near the middle of September. They'd settled in a nice inn by the seashore, and rented a small sailboat for just the two of them to take along a stretch of the coast. _

_ For the first time since she had known him, Georg was playing the role of a sea captain. And perfectly to boot! How she'd enjoyed watching him at the steering wheel, making it look so easy just like when he drove. He'd let her steer for a while, standing behind her and guiding her hands, for she wouldn't have dared done it on her own. Now he had anchored the sailboat near the coast, in a tiny bay where the water was fairly deep but still very warm._

_ In response to Maria's heartfelt honesty, Georg wrapped his arms around her waist, letting his cheek rest against hers as they embraced. "I'm very glad of that," he said softly. "I've wanted to show you the sea for almost as long as I've known you. I think I always knew you would understand how I felt about it."_

_ "Oh, yes," said Maria, her hand slipping inside his unbuttoned shirt so she could stroke the warm skin of his back. "Much the same as how I feel about my mountain."_

_ "Mmm," mumbled Georg, closing his eyes at the sensation of Maria's hand on his bare skin, kindling a familiar fire his sensual kiss had started. After a long, relaxing, minute, Georg pulled his head back to meet her eyes. He was wearing that mischievous look again. "And I can't deny that I've wanted to come back for a long time." To Maria's disappointment, he stepped back, breaking their contact. "There is something I have just been longing to do," said Georg, after removing his shirt and as he began removing his pants._

_ Maria's eyes widened at what he was doing. Did he mean to actually…She looked all around her, but there were no boats anywhere nearby. Though they had been physically intimate practically every night for the last two weeks, it had always been in the privacy of a bedroom. She wasn't sure she was ready to be…_this _adventurous yet. "Georg, what exactly are you doing?" she asked, trying not to sound nervous or alarmed._

_ Though his smile was mischievous, his eyes were gentle. "You'll see," he said, his tone matching his eyes. His pants came off, and Maria only had a moment to admire his beautiful body and olive skin in the sunlight before he did a perfect swan dive off the boat and into the water. Maria gasped and leaned over the railing, watching for him to come back up out of the water. He did, smiling after he took a big breath of air and giving a triumphant shout. "Oh, that feels good! Much as I love the lake back home, it really can't compare to this." _

_ She caught his gaze as he floated there in the water, and laughed out loud. "Well, I certainly didn't expect that!"_

_ Georg smirked at her in that special way, his blue eyes that matched the water sparkling wickedly. "I think I've been a bad influence on you, Fraulein, if you expected something entirely different." _

_ Maria made a face at him before she ducked her head in embarrassment._

_ "Well, what are you waiting for?" he asked, causing her to raise her head again._

_ "What?" she asked, not comprehending._

_ "You think I want to enjoy this wonderful water all by myself?" he asked rhetorically, motioning with his hand for her to jump in, too._

_ Instantly, all traces of the blush that had just filled Maria's cheeks vanished, leaving her face as pale as a full moon and her eyes wide as coins as she looked at the deep water before her._

_ "Maria?" _

_ "Huh?" Maria came back to reality, and looked at her husband again and tried to appear as though nothing were bothering her._

_ "Talk to me," said her husband, whose face said that he knew better._

_ Maria groaned and looked at the sky briefly. "All right, all right, you might as well know…I'm afraid of deep water."_

_ Georg's eyebrows went up, but his eyes were not mocking or shocked, but a touch concerned. "You _can _swim, can't you, Maria? I never got the impression you couldn't; you seemed incredibly in control after you and the children fell into the lake that day."_

_ "Yes, I can swim, I learned as a child," said Maria, her hands beginning to fidget. "But I only learned how to do a basic stroke and never spent a lot of time in the water. Growing up in the mountains, I only had a few swimming lessons, all before my parents died. As for that day in the lake, I was more worried about getting the children and the boat safely to shore than for myself. Also, the lake is quite shallow by the shore and I could stand in it without being submerged. But, when I can't feel the bottom while my head's above water…or being completely underwater with the bottom too far down…" Maria let her voice trail off, feeling pathetic voicing this fear to a sea captain. She still was very scared of not pleasing her new husband, in any way. "Please don't think less of me, I'm a mountain girl."_

_ "Maria," said Georg, his voice rich with compassion. "I could _never _think less of you."_

_ A moment of silence passed, him casually floating in the water and her leaning against the boat railing with trembling hands. Then, Maria seemed to get a new determination in her eyes, and reached behind her to unbutton and untie her summer dress._

_ "You don't have to if you don't want to, Maria," said Georg. "I wouldn't have asked you if I knew."_

_ "I know," said Maria, taking her dress off. "But aren't I always telling the children to try and conquer fears? I don't want to be a hypocrite…" Maria stepped to the spot where the railing ended, where Georg had dived off. Her hands were still shaking. "You'll, um…help me, right?"_

_ "I'll be right here," said Georg. _

_ Maria took as deep of a breath as she could, feeling a shiver go through her entire body. Even in the hot September air, Maria suddenly felt cold in only her bra and panties. And the water looked so beautiful, and Georg was there…_

_ Before she could let her fears take over or let her mind start thinking, Maria closed her eyes and jumped into the water as hard and far as she could, as if that could expel her fear. Then she was under, the many bubbles she had created _wrrrr_ing in her ears. She dared not open her eyes, and rose to the surface, arms flapping in panic, her legs doing the same because she felt nothing beneath her feet. Even the air and sunlight she came into contact with barely helped._

_ Then she felt Georg holding her, and she wrapped herself around him tightly, feeling as much of his warm, wet skin as she could. He spoke soothing words into her ear. "It's all right, I've got you, I've got you, you're safe…"_

_ This was more calming to Maria than anything else. When she felt herself completely calm, she lifted her head to look at Georg. She was smiling at her, his eyes dancing. "Good job, darling. That was one hell of a jump."_

_ Maria laughed abruptly, realizing how she had fought through her fears. "I'm all right!"_

_ "More than that," said Georg still smiling. "Do you trust me?"_

_ Maria nodded._

_ "Then take my hands. It will be all right." _

_ Slowly, Maria unwrapped her arms and legs from around him, and took his hands. Slowly, he backed away from her in the water, holding her hands tightly and keeping eye contact with her. She felt panic rise in her again, but it didn't get very far. "Just keep kicking, back and forth, like a metronome, steady rhythm." _

_ Maria took deep breaths and obeyed his orders. She found herself floating as steadily and easily as her husband. She felt thrill and a huge smile spread across her face. "I'm doing it!"  
"Yes, you are," said Georg, his smile as big as hers._

_ "The water's so warm, and so beautiful…" said Maria. This new feeling of accomplishment gave Maria a new bravery. "Go under with me."_

_ Georg understood and nodded. Both closed their eyes, took deep breaths, and, still holding hands, submerged underwater. Carefully, Maria opened her eyes. Her vision was blurred, of course, but she saw her husband looking right back at her. They rose to the surface again when they needed to breathe, and embraced, bobbing up and down in the water._

_ "You did it," breathed Georg into her ear. _

_ Maria smiled, holding him tighter. How could she think she could ever be complete without him? "Just don't let go of me, all right?" _

_ "Never, Maria," murmured Georg, kissing her below the ear. "_Never._"_

_ Their lips met in a passionate kiss, and Maria barely noticed that they went underwater again, safe in a cocoon of blue love…_

* * *

…_Again, everything seemed to shift. Maria and Georg melted together, and Maria felt something warm glowing, pulsating below her ribs, below her stomach, bringing her new life and into reality…_

When Maria regained consciousness, she was in her own bed, and her husband was beside her.


	8. Waking Reality

When Maria regained consciousness again, she purposefully did not open her eyes, because she could feel that she was no longer on her mountain. No, she was now somewhere much warmer, quieter, hopefully safer. She felt no pain or remnants of pain, and she knew that her baby was safe. Never had she felt more relieved.

Using her sense of touch, Maria deduced with relief that she was in her own bed. The mattress beneath her back was very familiar, and a familiar quilt was covering her and keeping her warm, while a familiar pillow rested under her head. Using her ears, Maria could hear howling wind and pouring rain against the windows. This made her feel _very _grateful that she was no longer on her mountain.

But before she could ask the question of how she had come from her mountain to her bedroom while unconscious, her senses gave her the answer. She heard the sound of steady breathing beside her, and a familiar warmth encasing one of her hands. Very slowly, Maria opened her eyes. The ceiling above her appeared and disappeared in the light of a single candle, the only light in the room. Shifting her gaze to her right, all suspicions were confirmed about the feeling around her hand and how she had come to safety from her mountain.

Georg was sitting beside her bedside in a chair, his head nodding to one side in sleep, but his hand still unconsciously holding her own. In the light of the single candle resting on her bedside table, she could finally look at him for the first time in hours. Clearly, he was deeply asleep. How long had they been here? When had he found her? Had that part of her dream been real, then? _Good God, what time is it?_

Maria attempted to sit up, taking her hand from Georg's unconscious grip as she did so. This action woke up her husband, and he immediately heard Maria's groan and saw her lay back down, a hand to her head. "Maria!" he exclaimed softly. He rose out of his chair and reached out his hands, touching her shoulder with one hand and her own hand with his other. "How are you feeling?"

His touch, as well as seeing him again, brought everything back to Maria's mind: what day it was, how he had treated her, all of the anger and hurt that she felt…But, at the moment, all of that took the second place in her mind. The first place was occupied by her _immediate _situation, especially not knowing the time and her weak physical state. So Maria, lying down again with her free hand to her forehead and her vision a little blurry, replied in a soft, slightly hoarse voice, "Filthy, hungry, weak, and confused."

She felt Georg squeeze her unresponsive hand. "Why don't you take a long, hot bath, while I make a meal for you?"

The kindness and concern in his voice made a lump rise in her throat. Her vision blurred even more, burning with tears, and she bit her lip to keep it from trembling. She turned her head slightly so she could look at Georg, but this caused a stray tear to fall from the corner of her right eye, travel down her temple and soak into the pillow. Her voice oddly quiet and steady, but reflecting all of her emotions, she pleaded, "Then you'll talk to me?"

Through her blurred vision, Maria could see her husband's blue eyes; they seemed to glow, but Maria couldn't see clearly enough to name all of the emotions in them. Georg lifted her limp hand which he still held, and kissed it tenderly but firmly. Holding her hand to his cheek, Georg said, his voice just as full as hers, "Then I will tell you everything."

Now all Maria wanted to do was follow her husband's suggestion of a hot bath, in the privacy of the bathroom where she could be alone and her tears could disappear into the water. Her hand still not responsive to his touch, she pulled it out of his grasp, rolled off the bed, and carefully made her way to the bathroom. Her limbs felt very weak and shaky, and the last thing she wanted to do was pass out again. Thankfully, she made it to the bathroom without incident; she did not look at Georg, and he made no attempt to follow or speak to her.

When she closed the door and was safely alone in the bathroom, Maria covered her mouth with her hand and sobbed silently, leaning against the door. She'd never felt more torn in her life. Half of her wanted to scream at Georg, to punch his chest, to slap his face, to shake him until she got her answers. The other half wanted to rush back to Georg, into his arms, beg him to kiss her, love her again. The only time she had felt this afraid to face her husband was the day she had returned to the villa after running away, knowing she had to confront her feelings but terrified that he wouldn't return them. Facing that fear had been more than worth it, and she knew that, eventually, she would have to leave the bathroom.

So she decided to, for the second time that day, do exactly what her husband told her to do: take a long, hot bath, emphasis on the former adjective especially. She took her time, using her favorite products on her skin and hair and taking the time to really pamper herself, something she only let herself do after she became married, and even after that it would be more for _his _benefit than her own. But now Maria did it for herself, and it was exactly what she needed. The hot water was very soothing on her tired muscles, and her favorite soaps, oils and shampoos cleaned and moisturized her skin after being in the November air for so long. She also took the time to dry herself off before putting on her nightgown and robe. The process was healing for Maria, because when she was finished, she may still have been frightened of what she would learn, but her resolutions that she had come to on her mountain had come back into her mind.

* * *

When she came back into the bedroom, Georg was not there. But the door to their private sitting room was open, and firelight was pouring out. Cautiously she approached the doorway and looked into the room. Georg was in front of the fire, stoking it and making it bigger. On the little table for two in the room was a tray of food and tea. Looking closely, Maria realized that the tray had some of her favorite foods: chicken and vegetable soup, fresh strawberries, and fresh bread with jam to go with the tea.

This gesture touched Maria's heart more than anything so far, and now she had a real faith that things between her and her husband would be all right.

Quietly, Maria walked to the table, sat down, and silently began to eat. She ate quickly and didn't leave a crumb, because she had not eaten anything since lunch, and then she hadn't had much of an appetite due to her worry and confusion over Georg's attitude. The whole time she ate her meal, Maria didn't look at Georg, though she felt his presence the entire time, felt his eyes watching her. The fire lit the room intimately, creating a nice warmth that contrasted with the wild and wet weather outside, and cast Georg's shadow on the wall beside her. So she knew he stood there watching her while she ate.

Eventually, she finished all of her meal and drank the last of her tea. But she didn't know what to do now. If she looked at Georg, she felt like she would just rush to him and wrap her arms around him, but she didn't want to do that until she had all of the answers she wanted. So she just sat there, staring at her empty plate and cup, wishing Georg would start talking, as he'd promised.

When she heard him approach her, she finally turned her head and watched him. He walked to her slowly, cautiously, afraid she would disappear maybe, his eyes burning with all he wanted to say, all he was trying to say. This was the opposite of the Georg she had seen this afternoon; then he had been closed off, now he was open to the point where it almost hurt to be so vulnerable.

Her heart was moved, so she stood up, facing him when he stopped right before her, looking him straight in the eyes. _I must face my problems, _she thought.

Maria reached the short distance and took both of his hands in hers. "Please talk to me, Georg," she pleaded softly. "I don't want to lose you."


	9. Healing Confessions Pt 1

"_Please talk to me, Georg," she pleaded softly. "I don't want to lose you."_

Her words seemed to have a deep effect on Georg. He held her hands very tightly back, and pressed his forehead to hers, a gesture he always did whenever he was looking for strength, or faith, or courage that he felt she had that he needed. This was a gesture he did whenever he felt vulnerable or scared. This gave Maria even more reassurance that soon she would get the answers she needed so desperately.

After a long minute of standing there in silence, Georg led his wife to the couch in front of the fireplace, where they had often talked late into the night since coming home from Paris. Georg did not let go of her hands when both were settled on the couch. He looked down at their joined hands and took a deep breath. "Oh, Maria…I…don't know where to start…"

He certainly sounded lost. and Maria took pity on him. "Well, start from yesterday. Nothing seemed amiss when you left for dinner yesterday…"

"You're right, nothing was," said Georg nodding, still looking at their hands. "At that time…It wasn't until my dinner with Ernst that I realized…We've known each other for a long time, and are friends as well as sharing business…Near the end of the meal, he said that he was glad he was able to meet with me tonight since tomorrow would be out of the question, it being the anniversary of Agathe's death and all. I realized then that…I hadn't remembered it."

Safe to say, Maria was surprised at her husband. He had forgotten the anniversary of his beloved first wife's death? The wife he had nearly destroyed his children's love out of grief for? The wife whose death had haunted him for over three years? All she could say incredulously was, "You forgot about it? _That's _why you didn't tell me?"

Georg let go of her hands to run his own through his hair in frustration. "I knew it was this month, and for some reason I thought it was next week, I don't know…so when he told me I thought at first that _he _had to be mistaken, but realizing what day it was, I knew he was right and…" He sighed, bringing his hands down and taking hers again. "I didn't let on to him what was happening in my head, but I ended the meeting soon and went straight into my study once I got home. I just…_couldn't _believe I had forgotten, or misjudged the date…I drank some whiskey and fell asleep on the couch…

"When I woke up in the morning at dawn, I had a raging headache from the whiskey and even more rage at myself still. I realized then that I hadn't told you what the day was, that I hadn't even come to you last night…I became even more disgusted with myself…So I cut myself off from you, because I was angry with myself. I came upstairs, washed up and changed without waking you…I felt ashamed, confused and angry…"

Maria nodded slowly, understanding spreading through her, and her biggest question answered made her feel more at ease to speak. "That certainly explains some things, Georg," she said, stroking one of his hands. "But I would have understood if you'd told me then. When I was about ten years old, I forgot the anniversary of my mother's death…it had been a terrible day, at school and with my so-called guardian. It wasn't until that night that I realized what day it really was…I ran to my mother's grave, cried and apologized a thousand times…These things happen, Georg, and sometimes we just can't help but be human and make mistakes…You should have told me."

Georg nodded, kissing her hand again. "I know that now, and I'm so sorry…"

Maria raised that hand to cup his chin, lifting his face so she could meet his eyes. He often did this in their engagement, when she became embarrassed or shy, helping her become more comfortable with him, letting her know that there was nothing she couldn't tell him, that he would always be there to listen. Now she returned the gesture, telling him the very same thing. "So that's why you avoided me, isn't it? You kept that anger inside for so long it caused you to snap at me like that."

Georg shut his eyes tightly for a moment, bringing her hands up to rest on his heart, which beat strongly, a little faster than normal because of his emotional state. "You know me too well, my love…That was a big reason, but it was not the only reason…"

Maria raised an eyebrow gently, encouraging him to continue, which he did after a moment of collecting himself. He pressed his forehead to hers again, the warmth of his body so close to her added to the warmth she was feeling from the fire in the grate.

"Every moment of this past day, I wanted nothing more than to run to you and hold you to me…but I didn't know if I even could, if it would be right…the circumstances being what they were…The fact that I had forgotten and miscalculated just made it worse…I may be a widower for four years now, but that doesn't mean I know what to do in these situations…I didn't know if it would be right to seek comfort in you, and because I'd already made a mistake I didn't want to make another one…" His hands shook and his jaw tightened. "But I did…I made an even worse one...just like last summer…"

His head fell to rest on her left shoulder, and Maria caressed his dark head tenderly, wordlessly encouraging him to keep talking, to let it all out. As her understanding deepened, her anger faded. The Reverend Mother had been right: there had been aspects of the situation she couldn't know and only Georg could reveal; there really had been a reason for everything.

"What's wrong with me, Maria?" he breathed hoarsely, his hands now gripping her waist as his body shook with sobs. "I promised myself when I reconnected with my children that I wouldn't do this again, I wouldn't hurt those I loved most again…"

"Georg…" murmured Maria, tears coming to her own eyes, emphatically feeling Georg's pain, now reassured that his actions of the past day had come from a genuine place of pain and a sense of duty, rather than something much more ugly that had never existed inside her husband. If it did, Maria would be mad to love him. "You're only human. You've had a shock, you made a mistake, and it happens to everyone. You can't punish yourself forever, because it's not only you who will get hurt."

With those words, Georg lifted Maria onto his lap, so he could hold her as close as he could while he sobbed. Maria did not resist and held him back, crying with him. She felt unbelievably relieved and honored that this was happening, because she knew that Georg was a very private person, very cautious about opening up to anybody. Now he was being as open and as vulnerable as he could be to her, and she knew that he would never be this open with anybody else, just as she would never be as open to anybody other than her Georg.

Eventually, Georg's sobs calmed and he pulled his head back to look at her. His face reflected his agony. "I hurt you," he said, his voice reflecting his eyes. "I'm so sorry I hurt you. Once those words were out of my mouth, I seemed to wake up because I knew I'd gone too far. I could see clearly, watching the anger, hurt and despair appear on your face. And to hear you call me 'Captain' like that…I watched the children run after you so I knew you would be in good hands, while I collected myself, try and find out what was wrong with me, what had been wrong with me all day…" He put a hand to her cheek, his eyes pleading. "Please, my love, believe me, I never wanted to hurt you."

Maria shook her head and wiped the tears off his cheeks gently. "I know you would never intentionally hurt me, Georg. I've always known that…but I can't deny how terrified I felt today…" Maria's voice drifted as she realized a primary reason of the fear she had felt for over twenty-four hours. The reason she had not yet told her husband.

Said husband seemed to read that she had a secret in her eyes. "Maria?"

"I…" Maria suddenly found it very difficult to speak, but she fought through it. "I'm sorry you have to find this out in these circumstances…"

"Maria, what is it? What's wrong?" Georg's voice reflected his fear, and he set Maria back down on the couch so he could kneel in front of her, holding her hands. "Whatever it is, I'm not going anywhere."

His words were just what Maria needed to hear after everything they had been through. She found her voice, though it was still little more than a breath as she held his hands. "Georg…I'm pregnant."


	10. Healing Confessions Pt 2

"_Georg…I'm pregnant."_

Maria watched anxiously as Georg's facial expression froze and his eyes widened in surprise. A tense, silent moment followed, and then the surprise in Georg's eyes made room for great joy. Maria breathed a sigh of relief as a smile spread across Georg's face, and she knew her biggest fear had been groundless. "_Pregnant…_Oh, my love!" Georg pulled them both to their feet, and let go of her hands to caress her stomach, which had yet to show any signs of the life she now carried inside her.

"I take it you're happy, then?" Maria teased, but she meant it, too; her smile revealed how happy Georg's reaction made her.

"_Happy? _Of course I am, Maria! This is wonderful!" He shook his head slightly, as if remembering to be responsible as well as happy. "We should set up an appointment with Hans, or a female doctor, if you'd prefer –"

Maria stopped him by holding up her hand. "I've already seen Hans, darling. I'm six weeks along, and perfectly healthy."

Georg breathed a sigh of relief, still caressing her stomach when suddenly his fingers stopped their movement and he looked at her inquisitively. "When did you see Hans, Maria, and why didn't you tell me?"

"Well, the only symptoms I felt were my two missed periods, and I wanted to be absolutely sure before I told you, in case it was nothing…" Maria paused, realizing what she was about to tell him would wipe the beautiful smile off his face. "I saw Hans at the same time you were having dinner with Ernst in town…I was going to tell you last night, but…well…"

A huge lump rose in her throat and her eyes filled with tears as Georg's expression turned from curious to absolutely horrified. "Oh, God…" he breathed, his hands rising up to her face as the tears fell, her face scrunching up in a repressing a powerful sob. "Oh, Maria, what kind of hell have I put you through?" Georg pulled Maria into his arms, holding her tightly to his chest as she cried, finally finding a release for all of the fear she had felt the moment she had found out the news.

"I was so scared…and I'm still so scared, Georg…I felt so alone today…so terrified…I never thought I would bring a child into the world…What if I c-can't do it? What if I make some terrible mistake? I thought I'd made one today by just…being in your life…"

"Oh, Maria, _no!_" said Georg, lifting her chin so he could look at her. "Listen to me: you have done _nothing _wrong. This whole day, what happened was _my _fault, because I shut you out by trying to do what I thought was right, but it wasn't…" He cupped her face gingerly, wiping away her tears. "You truly believe you had no right to be my wife? You feel unworthy to be the mother of my children?" He shook his head as his eyes suddenly lit up. "Stay right here."

With that, Georg walked back into the bedroom. Maria immediately missed his touch and warmth, and sank back down onto the couch, desperately trying to pull herself together. He came back in quickly, holding a folded piece of paper in his hands. He sat down beside his wife and handed the paper to her. "The night after the rowboat incident, I finally found the courage to go through my late wife's belongings I had kept hidden in the attic. I found this, something I had not known existed anymore…I'm not sure when she meant for me to find it, but it couldn't have come at a better time. I hope this helps you as much as it helped me."

Georg held out the piece of paper to Maria, who took it slowly. Unfolding the paper, she saw it was some kind of letter, written in a very pretty, elegant hand. There were places where the writing would become shaky, but otherwise it was all very legible. With trembling fingers, Maria unfolded the paper, smoothed it out on her lap, and read the words in the firelight.

_Georg,_

_I'm looking at you as I write this, watching you sleep in the chair beside my bed. I will have Ellen hide this away with my things when it is finished, all before you wake up. So I do not know exactly when you will find this letter, but I want to make sure it is after I am gone._

_Forgive me, but it is best if I do this in a letter. Whenever I try to talk to you about after I pass, you refuse to acknowledge the possibility that I will not recover. I know how stubborn you are, but Georg, that possibility has become a fact. I can feel it in every part of me, as my body grows weaker and weaker. Even this small pen feels heavy in my fingers, and each word is an effort to write. But I know I have to do this, because soon it will be too late._

_While I know where I'm going will bring me the peace and relief only God can provide, my heart breaks for leaving you and our children. I hate that I will be leaving this family broken, and leaving you alone. I know you, Georg: you will want to face your grief alone. Stubborn man, it is _not _a weakness to seek help. But I also know that, when time has healed your immediate pain, you will realize I am right, and love again._

_Yes, Georg, I chose my words correctly: you will fall in love again. If you truly love me and our children, you will find love again. You will not leave this family broken and grieving, and stubbornly live your life angry, sad and alone. I will die, Georg, but you will not. You are not meant to be alone, my darling. I have faith that, when time has helped you to move on, you will open your heart again, heal, and love to the fullest. You will find someone who will heal our family, become a true mother to our children, and love you as you need and deserve to be loved. Do not think that your heart will die when I die, Georg; God gave life to you so you could live, not so you could chase ghosts that can never come back. _

_She is out there, Georg, and I will do all I can to make sure you find her. God would not be so cruel to you and the children as to leave you broken forever. I will help him find an angel for you all, and I will smile when your hearts find each other and come together._

_My pen is so heavy now, and you are stirring, so I will finish this. I have faith you will do the right thing, Georg, and remember I will be watching over all of you._

_I love you, and always will._

_Agathe_

When Maria finished reading the letter, she did not cry. Perhaps she had cried so much in the past twenty-four hours that she had none left to cry. But Maria had no impulse to sob; on the contrary, she finally felt the peace she had been searching for wash over her, a true sense of home, belonging, and love. Here was the sign she had asked for at Agathe's grave, and now she felt as if both Agathe and God were putting hands on her shoulders in silent blessing.

Taking a content breath, Maria folded up the letter, kissed it, and handed it back to her husband. Georg took it and placed it on the table by the sofa, then turned back to Maria to cup her face again, holding her gaze. "I am…_so _sorry…for everything that happened today, Maria. Can you forgive me?"

Maria made no verbal reply. Her eyes glowing with love, Maria leaned forward and kissed him, very tenderly that left him in no doubt of her feelings. He returned the kiss, caressing her cheeks with his thumbs. When their lips parted, Maria rested her head on his shoulder and whispered, "Yes. I love you so much."

"And I love you," said Georg, wrapping his arms around her. "With all my heart."

They stayed like that for a few minutes, as the fire crackled away and the rain poured down outside. Eventually, Maria spoke, not lifting her heavy head off her husband's shoulder. "I think I can sleep now. I feel exhausted."

Georg nodded. "Me, too. Come on."

Together they went into their bedroom, falling asleep almost instantly once in the bed and each other's arms.

* * *

At dawn, Maria woke up. She smiled before she opened her eyes, relishing in the sound of Georg's heartbeat beneath her as her head lay on his chest, and in the sensation of his arms holding her to him even in sleep. It was rare that she woke up before her early-bird husband, and she took advantage of each rare opportunity to look at her husband so at peace. After spending the previous day and night without him, and remembering all that had happened the previous night, this was heaven for Maria.

After she had satisfied her eyes, Maria felt her body wake up, so she carefully left her husband's arms as he slept and went into the bathroom. When she'd finished her morning toilette, Maria found herself looking at her full body reflection in the mirror. Slowly, she lifted her nightgown until her stomach was exposed, and she examined it with both her eyes and hand. Was there really a little life growing inside her? A child that she and Georg had created out of their love? Maria tried to think back to when their child had been conceived, which night it could have been…

Somehow, she was not shocked when she felt her husband stand behind her, his chest pressing against her back, and his hands joining hers to caress her bare stomach. "You're beautiful," he breathed against her neck before kissing her there.

Maria chuckled, leaning her head back to give him better access, melting under his romantic touches. "I'm sure that won't be the case when the morning sickness starts or when I'll be as big as a whale."

"No," said Georg, breathing into her ear, covering her hands over her stomach. "You will be absolutely radiant, carrying our child."

Maria got a tear in her eye, looking at their reflections in the mirror. "I'm still a little scared…" she whispered, for it was the truth. She never thought that motherhood would be in the cards for her, and she had lost her own mother so long ago.

"Maria," Georg said, meeting her eyes in the mirror. "Our baby was created by our love, and will be born into a loving family, which wouldn't have been either if not for you. Don't be afraid; you will never be alone through this. I'd kill myself before I let that happen." The conviction in his tone was more than enough for Maria, especially after all that had happened.

She caressed his cheek. "I'm glad you've had some experience with this sort of thing," she said, half-teasing and half-serious.

He returned her smile and kissed her nose.

Maria sighed and took a step back. "I'll give you some privacy," she said, and walked out of the bathroom after a brief caress of the hands.

* * *

When alone in the bedroom again, she slowly made the bed, waiting for Georg to come back out. She looked out the window across the room. The rain had stopped some time in the night, but the sky was still overcast with heavy November clouds.

Maria softly sang, the words just coming to her as she thought of the past thirty-six hours.

_"When this all began,_

_ We knew there'd be a price to pay._

_ Too late now to turn away:_

_ We have come too far…" _

Maria looked down and touched her stomach, singing to her child, vowing to do the best job she could do to overcome her fears.

_"I know we'll find a way…"_

Her voice faded as she sensed her husband's presence behind her. Slowly she turned around and saw him standing in the doorway. He looked at her. She looked at him. Their need for each other that had been growing and mounting became too powerful to contain, craving each other after all that had happened. In the next moment, the husband and wife were kissing desperately and falling onto the freshly-made bed…

* * *

**A/N: **_Song is from "Jekyll & Hyde: The Musical"._


	11. Happy Family

Maria knew that she had a big, silly, and stupid-looking grin between her flushed cheeks, but she didn't care. She was too happy and comfortable, snuggled up to her husband under the warm covers of their bed, bathing in the afterglow. Georg had made love to her as passionately as he had on their wedding night, ravishing her to the point where he had to cover her mouth with his to quiet her cry of ecstasy.

When she heard the clock in their bedroom give a low chime, announcing half past six, she sighed with resignation. "We should get up, so we can get the children ready for school."

Georg's arms tightened around her. "Don't worry, love. I asked Frau Schmidt and Liesl to take care of getting them all up on time. So we can have a bit of a lie-in before joining them for breakfast."

Maria smiled, but then looked at him with questions in her eyes. "I don't remember coming home, or you finding me. What happened?"

Georg sighed and leaned over her, running his fingers along her collar bone. "After dinner, I knew I had to find you and make things right. I tried to think like you: where would you go to feel safe? I phoned the abbey, and the Reverend Mother told me you have come for a mass and you'd talked to each other, but she said you weren't there anymore and didn't know where you'd gone. The next place I thought of was your mountain…Without you to guide me, it took me a while to find your spot in the dark…when I finally found it…and saw you lying there…so still…"

Maria saw the anguish in his eyes, and knew that he had been more than punished for his behavior yesterday when he saw her like that, especially considering what had happened four years ago that day. To help drive that away, Maria wrapped her arms around Georg and held him to her. "I'm right here, Georg," said Maria firmly. "And thanks to you, I'm not the worse for wear."

Georg kissed her neck, his head resting on her shoulder while he supported himself on his forearms to keep from crushing her. "Well, I picked you up, wrapped you in that blanket I keep in the car, and drove you home as fast as was legally possible. The children had just been put to bed, so I was able to get you straight to our room without a panic. Frau Schmidt helped me, and we discerned that you were not injured or feverish; you'd most likely passed out from exhaustion, or stress, or a combination of both."

Maria nodded, running her fingers through his hair. "That sounds accurate. I remember I stood up quickly, determined to go straight home and confront you about what was going on. But once I did, I felt so dizzy I couldn't see, and then…I woke up safe in my bed."

"And that's just where I plan to keep you today," Georg whispered in her ear before beginning to kiss her neck. "I have nothing planned today…except making up for the hours I shut you out…Is that acceptable to you?"

"Mm," Maria moaned, closing her eyes as her back arched. "Absolutely, darling."

Georg smiled at that and lifted his head, chuckling when he saw her reactionary face to his stopping his kisses. "However, we _will _have breakfast with the children. After what happened at dinner last night, they would have my head if we didn't."

Maria raised an eyebrow. "Oh? What happened?"

Georg turned them over so they lay on their sides, facing each other (Georg kept an arm securely around her waist). "Well, I was the last to arrive for dinner, to find the seven of them staring daggers at me. After the blessing was said, the dam broke loose. All of the children demanded to know why I was not talking to you, why I had spoken to you like that; the one that really broke my heart was Marta, who said 'You made Mother cry!' while she cried. If I hadn't already seen the grave error of my ways when I saw your tears, I certainly would have then."

"Oh, my goodness," murmured Maria. She could easily picture the entire scene, especially considering how the children had comforted her after he had snapped at her. "Louisa _did _tell me that if you didn't apologize, they would make you."

Georg chuckled, stroking her hip. "I should have known that the children would someday repay their debt to you."

"Debt?"

"Oh, yes," said Georg seriously, nodding. "They became indebted to you that day you all fell in the lake and we had that argument. You were their knight in shining armor, and rightfully so. Now they have done the same for you." He sighed and pressed his forehead to hers. "But one thing doesn't change: I'm always the evil monster."

Maria's heart went out to her husband, and she held him for a moment, before pulling back and gripping his chin so he looked at her. "Captain," she said with authority, half-teasing and half-serious. "Brooding is not an option this morning. Now let's make good use of our lie-in before the morning meal, eh sailor?"

Instantly, Georg's sad expression became one of loving mischief. In the next moment, Maria squeaked as Georg rolled them over so he was above her. "Yes, ma'am."

Maria's giggles were soon silenced by kisses.

* * *

When Maria and Georg walked into the dining room just (barely) in time for breakfast, all seven children gave hopeful smiles when they saw their smiling parents walk in with joined hands.

"Is everything all better now?" asked little Gretl, watching her parents carefully. It had scared her more than she knew when she watched her father speak to her mother in a way it made her mother cry. She'd never seen a grown-up cry before.

In response, her father gave a look of pretend concern to Maria. "Let's make sure they have no doubts about that, shall we?" Then, without a word or indication of warning, Georg wrapped his arm around Maria and kissed her with a theatrical dip. While the girls went "Aw!" and the boys went "Ew!" all seven of them laughed with joy and relief.

Maria walked to her seat beside Gretl – her face red as a tomato – caressing each child she passed along the way. Sitting down, she leaned over and kissed Gretl's head. "Yes, darling, everything is all better now. None of you need to worry anymore."

While all seven children knew that their mother was an extraordinary woman who was capable of a lot of things, they knew that she was _not _a very good liar. So those words, along with the sight of her happy eyes and smile were more than enough reassurance for them that their parents' relationship was as strong as ever, perhaps even stronger.

"Darling, would you please say the blessing?" asked Georg, smiling at her from the other end of the table.

"Certainly," replied Maria. After that was done, breakfast commenced with much chatting and merriment, as there usually was. Frau Schmidt came in and out, filling cups and taking plates away, smiling at the sight of the family mended and happy again. Seeing her mistress unconscious the previous night had given her a great feeling of fear, and prayed to God that He would not let history repeat itself. Her prayer had been answered, it seemed.

Near the end of the meal, she was about to exit for the kitchen after refilling Liesl's orange juice, but her employer stopped her with a smile. "Wait just a moment, Frau Schmidt. I'd like you to stay for this." The Captain turned his gaze to Maria and gave her a smile and wink, a silent message. Looking at his children again, he said, "Your mother has some news to tell you."

Maria's face reflected the excitement and nervousness that was battling inside her. She seemed at a loss for the right words, so Gretl took her hand and said, "What is it, Mother?"

This action seemed to give Maria the right words. She grasped Gretl's hand and said to the five-year-old, "Well, Gretl, let's just say that soon, you will not be the youngest anymore."

A moment of silence followed, and then all of the older girls gasped, smiling. "Oh, Mother! You're going to have a baby?" asked Brigitta with joy.

Maria's smile was radiant. "Yes, children. Soon you will have a little brother or sister."

"Oh, I hope it's a boy," said Friedrich, even as he got up with his siblings to kiss his mother in congratulations.

"Yes," agreed Kurt, kissing both of his mother's cheeks before turning to his father. "There are _enough_ girls in this family, don't you think, Father?"

Both boys looked across the table at their beaming father, who only said neutrally, "My only wishes are for the baby to be born healthy and for your mother to be safe, and I know you boys would love a sister just as much as a brother." He gave both of them a pointed look, but a kind and understanding one that made both boys smile and nod at their father.

"May I help you when the baby comes, Mother?" asked Marta, hugging her mother tightly.

"Of course, Marta!" said Maria, kissing her head. "I would welcome your help."

"And that goes for all of you," said Georg, looking at all seven children meaningfully. "I'm counting on you to help your mother any time she needs it."

All seven children nodded and said words of affirmation to their father's veiled command.

"That won't include changing diapers, will it?" Maria heard Friedrich whisper to Louisa, which made her softly chuckle.

"When will the baby come, Mother?" asked Brigitta, looking at Maria's tummy.

"I would say…early July, so next summer," replied Maria with a smile, already dreaming of her summer baby.

Then Gretl asked abruptly to the room at large. "Where _do _babies come from, anyway?"

This made the room dead silent, so everyone could hear the clock time eight times. "All right, children!" said Frau Schmidt, taking action. "The school bus will be here in fifteen minutes, so let's gather our things and get our coats on!"

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, Maria stood at the gates of the villa, waving to the children as the school bus began to drive away down the road. Once it was gone, Georg dropped his hand and wiped his brow theatrically with an even more theatrical, "Whew!"

Maria threw her head back and laughed, knowing exactly why he was doing that. "Well, I know that school will cause her to forget about that question before she gets home. However, I'm sure she'll be asking questions again as I get bigger."

Georg chuckled and scratched the back of his neck. "Ah, I know. I _greatly _look forward to having that little talk with Marta and Gretl." His tone dripped with happy sarcasm, and turned to look at Maria. "And you have to join me, former postulant or not."

Maria laughed and nodded. "All right. But prepare me now about what should be said. After all, you've done this five times before."

"Well," said Georg, smiling at his explanation. "We will say that the father plants a special kind of seed in the mother's tummy. In nine months, that seed grows into a baby."

"Hmm," said Maria, smiling at the explanation. "Simple yet true." Her eyes acquired an adorably wicked gleam. "But I'm sure at least Brigitta has asked you just _how _that seed got into the mother's tummy. After all, you can't just dig a hole in my stomach with a spade and drop it in."

Georg laughed at the conversation, which had turned to flirting, and wrapped his arms round her waist. "You're right. I simply said that the mother and father do a special kind of cuddle only they can do."

"Ah," said Maria, wrapping her own arms around his neck, even more amused by his explanations. "Special kind of cuddle, eh? I've never heard it put in such terms before. Might I ask that you enlighten me on the, um, _adult_, definition?"

Georg made no verbal reply, but instead scooped her up in his arms and walked back to the villa at a good, eager pace, a wicked but extremely happy smile on his face.

Maria laughed just as happily, leaning her face against his neck and relishing in every sensation in that moment – and the ones that followed.

All was right with the world.


End file.
